May 2013
4 posts
May 14th
41 notes
MY BOXERS ARE TOO SMALL FOR MY BUTT AND LEGS AND I THINK IM GOING BLIND IN MY RIGHT EYE PHIL COLLINS IS ON THE RADIO AND EVERY MOMENT OF YOUR LIFE IS TECHNICALLY AN EMERGENCY THERES ROUGHLY EQUAL DATA TO SUPPORT EITHER SIDE BUT REMAINING POSITIVE SEEMS LIKE THE BETTER CHOICE EVEN IF EVERYTHING IS TERRIBLE
May 12th
27 notes
May 12th
22 notes
ITS NOT FAIR BUT I PRESUME PEOPLE WHO WHISTLE ALSO OCCASIONALLY COMMIT MURDER
May 11th
19 notes
April 2013
19 posts
MY GIRLFRIEND IS VISITING ME TOMORROW TO PREPARE I’VE HIDDEN JARS OF HONEY AROUND MY ROOM SHE LIKES TO BURROW
Apr 30th
20 notes
Apr 26th
45 notes
Apr 26th
108 notes
Apr 23rd
17 notes
Apr 20th
18 notes
Apr 20th
36 notes
Apr 19th
41 notes
Apr 18th
24 notes
Apr 12th
21 notes
Apr 12th
16 notes
Apr 11th
216 notes
I WISH I WAS 14 AGAIN ALSO 13 ALSO 12 I WISH I WAS ALL THE AGES I’VE EVER BEEN AT ONCE I WANT TO FILL UP WHOLE ROOMS WITH MYSELF AT VARIOUS STAGES OF MY PHYSICAL DEVELOPMENT AND THERE ARE EVEN SO MANY OF US THAT WE ARE SPILLING OUT OF THE DOORS WE ARE MINGLING IN THE STREET JUST LIKE GETTING INTO EACHOTHER I WANT TO ORGANIZE A REUNION OF MYSELVES AND KEEP ORGANIZING IT FOR THE NEXT SEVERAL...
Apr 11th
47 notes
IT’S EASY TO BE A GENIUS IF YOU JUST TRAIN YOURSELF TO STOP SAYING OR THINKING STUPID THINGS THE NEXT STEP IS TO THINK REALLY SMART THINGS INSTEAD ALSO MOST PEOPLE ARE STUPID SO TRY TO FORGET ANYTHING ANYONE’S EVER TOLD YOU
Apr 11th
17 notes
WatchWatch
incandescens: HI EVERYONE if you are feeling lonely i will read u poetry welcome to the SECOND edition of brittany’s poetry hour!!! i am sorry this took me so long to upload hopefully it won’t take forever next time poems included: TPHD - I WISH YOU WOULD LEARN YOU ARE ALIVE (1:50) tphd.tumblr.com/post/28323379304/i-wish-you-would-learn-you-are-alive lk shaw - love in the time of google...
Apr 9th
48 notes
Apr 9th
59 notes
TAKE ALL MY BLOOD AWAY AND GIVE IT TO A DIFFERENT ONE THAN ME LIKE A THIRSTY HORSE OR A PLANT THAT YEARNS FOR BLOOD DO YOU THINK ANY PLANT HAS EVER YEARNED FOR BLOOD I JUST PICTURED A RACCOON WITH A IV IN HAS A RACCOON EVER GOT A BLOOD TRANSFUSION A HOSPITAL RUN BY RACCOONS (IT’S A BUNCH OF MEDICINAL TRASH PILES THEY NEST YOU IN) (LIKE HERBAL TRASH PILES) (I WANT TO TOUCH A...
Apr 9th
16 notes
Apr 8th
108 notes
Apr 8th
25 notes
LOL MY "MEMOIRS"
I was born under unusual circumstances. My mother was a svelte, graceful but capricious witch and my father a disembodied warrior from the 12th century that seduced my mother one night during an autumn heat which had crashlanded in town a few days before and immediately began stirring up trouble. When I imagine them making love, I picture all the windows and doors of our stately (and capacious)...
Apr 2nd
21 notes
Apr 1st
15 notes
March 2013
22 posts
Mar 31st
9 notes
Mar 31st
35 notes
Mar 31st
9 notes
THE FEELING YOUR BLOOD IS RUNNING AWAY FROM YOU AND ALSO THAT THERE IS SOMETHING BREATHING INSIDE YOUR LIMBS HOW MANY THINGS ARE WE CARRYING AROUND INSIDE US AND DO WE INCLUDE THE SNEAKING SUSPICION THAT GIVEN ENOUGH TIME AND THE RIGHT EQUIPMENT WE MIGHT PROVE THAT EVERYTHING IS A VESSEL MAYBE THAT’S ALL IT IS THINGS CARRYING OTHER THINGS CARRYING OTHER THINGS BUT ON AN EXHAUSTIVE,...
Mar 30th
30 notes
ONE MORNING YOU WAKE UP FROM TROUBLED DREAMS TO DISCOVER YOU’VE BEEN PREAPPROVED FOR A GREAT NUMBER OF THINGS YOU NEITHER NEED NOR WANT AND THAT THEY ARE MOVING DIRECTLY TOWARD YOU EVEN NOW AT A STEADY, INEXORABLE PACE, ONE MINUTE PER MINUTE ONE MORNING YOU WAKE UP AND WALK TO 7-11 TO ACHIEVE A 16 OZ CUP OF COFFEE AND SUDDENLY REMEMBER YOU ARE A BEING MADE ENTIRELY OF POWERFUL LIGHTS ONLY...
Mar 29th
60 notes
Mar 24th
21 notes
I SPENT 25 YRS LEARNING TO PICK POCKETS SO I COULD SIT NEXT TO PEOPLE AT SUBWAY AND EAT THE OLIVES OFF THEIR STUPID SANDWICHES WITH IMPUNITY
Mar 24th
9 notes
I SLEPT IN A KILN LAST NIGHT WHEN I WOKE UP MY SKIN WAS PERFECT SHIMMERING AND COMPLETELY CLEAN I HELD MY HAND UNDER THE RUNNING WATER OF THE FAUCET AND FELT LIKE DA VINCI
Mar 21st
24 notes
I AM GOING TO LEGALLY CHANGE MY NAME TO A HANDFUL OF DIRT YOU HAVE TO LET IT SIFT THROUGH YOUR FINGERS TO SPEAK IT
Mar 20th
28 notes
MOOD: I WISH I WAS A TINY DOG MADE OF POISON
Mar 20th
16 notes
PETITION FOR ADULT SIZE TRICYCLES TO REPLACE CARS
Mar 19th
38 notes
SIGN UP FOR A 25 YEAR MEMBERSHIP AND RECEIVE SPECIAL GIFTS YOU NEVER EXPECTED AND MIGHT NOT WANT MEMBERSHIP INCLUDES MANY VALUABLE MEMBER BENEFITS INCLUDING A CESSATION OF THAT HISSING NOISE
Mar 18th
15 notes
GO AHEAD AND MAKE MISTAKES FREELY YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN DEBILITATING DISEASE WILL CREATE LESIONS IN YOUR BRAIN AND INTERRUPT YR SENSE OF BALANCE, SHORT TERM MEMORY, OCULAR FOCUS, MOOD, JUDGMENT, MUSCLE CONTROL,
Mar 12th
28 notes
I KNOW WHALES GOT WORRIES MAYBE FEELINGS ARE A LOW PRESSURE PHENOMENON DO HIGH FLYING BIRDS GOT, LIKE, A LOT OF FEELINGS
Mar 12th
7 notes
DO YOU THINK GIANT SQUID EVER FEEL ANXIETY
Mar 12th
13 notes
HAS ANYONE EVER WRITTEN A NOVEL WHILE WEARING JNCO JEANS
Mar 12th
45 notes
Mar 11th
12 notes
ANY SUFFICIENTLY ADVANCED SOCIAL NETWORK IS INDISTINGUISHABLE FROM HIGH SCHOOL/HUMANITY’S INNATE TENDENCY TOWARD TRIBALISM
Mar 10th
18 notes
IF I COULD BE ANY ANIMAL I’D BE A SWARM OF SUPERWORM JUST AFTER THEY’VE DEMOLISHED THE LAST HUMAN STRUCTURE AND THOUGHT TO THEMSELVES “WHAT’S NEXT?”
Mar 10th
9 notes
MONSANTO IS PROBABLY MY PICK FOR MOST DIRECTLY EVIL CORPORATION, BUT THEY DID PRODUCE SUPERWORMS AND NOW I GET TO SAY SUPERWORMS I HOPE ALL OF OUR CROPS AND ARMS AND LEGS AND FACES ARE EATEN BY THE COMING SWARM OF SUPERWORM THANKS, MONSANTO
Mar 9th
13 notes
Mar 7th
34 notes
February 2013
22 posts
HI TUMBLR, I’VE GOT A POEM UP AT EVERYDAY GENIUS, CAPPING OFF A BRILLIANT MONTH OF GUEST EDITING BY STEPHEN TULLY DIERKS CHECK OUT THE WHOLE SHEBANG FANTASTIC STUFF ♥ http://www.everyday-genius.com/2013/02/theron-jacobs.html
Feb 28th
16 notes
there’s always slightly more than first expected if space is infinite then people are too if space is finite, well there’s room enough yet for whole new yous to come spilling out in the afternoon there’s room to admit the numbers are screaming the world is not sized for human minds even humans are bigger than themselves you might inhale and discover a whole new...
Feb 26th
22 notes
Feb 25th
20 notes
the few things i remember about my father watching him buy the morning paper for 15 cents or a quarter and pulling out all the rest of the papers and leaving them for free on top of the box. a vague and stupid antiestablishment gesture which despite its childishness i admired for its neatness and efficiency and which i came to recognize, later, in the form of protest my punk rock friends...
Feb 23rd
21 notes
Feb 20th
316 notes