22nd June 2012

Post with 12 notes

I GUESS THE WORST THING ABOUT TODAY WAS WHEN THE AWARDS I GOT FOR BEING HANDSOME WERE SOMEHOW DISLODGED FROM THEIR CAREFULLY ARRANGED GALLERY AND SENT TUMBLING IN GRACEFUL, GLEAMING ARCS OUT OF MY 12FTH STORY BEDROOM WINDOW ONLY TO CRASHLAND INTO DOZENS OF MY FAVORITE DOLPHINS IN THE POOL DOWN BELOW

ALSO I HAD SURGERY AND IM DYING

ALSO I HAD TO PEE FOR A LONG TIME BUT DIDN’T PEE AND I FELT UNCOMFORTABLE

ALSO A WITCH REPLACED MY EYES WITH JELLY BEANS AND IM BLIND

ALSO…ETC

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